Why Did I End Up Falling For You?
by Partridge On A Pear Tree
Summary: He wanted some time alone. It felt painful… everything does. But no one cares about him. He can cry his eyes out, up to the point that they will be sore, but that's about it. No one cares. Onesided Shizaya. Oneshot.


_Inspired by __'__Doushite__'__ by DBSK._

Orihara Izaya is a person always carrying a smile. He's the kind of person that you will never see cry. Up to the point that when he cries, nobody knows, nobody's there, he's always alone. But that was fine with him. It was always been that way and always will be.

Just like right now.

He has purposefully dismissed his secretary, Yagiri Namie, early today. He wanted some time alone. It felt painful… everything does. But no one cares about him. He can cry his eyes out, up to the point that they will be sore, but that's about it. No one cares.

There is one certain person he thought that will suffer the same fate as he… The fate of being alone eternally. He thought that it would be great to befriend that person, because he thinks that they're of the same kind. But then, when he hasn't even uttered a single word to that person yet, that person proclaimed…

"_You piss me off.__"_

Izaya was shocked, he admits. He didn't forget to bring his charming smile, and he hasn't said anything snarky yet. But why… Why does that being named Heiwajima Shizuo disliked him ever since?

Shizuo delivered a punch to him the moment he said those words. So what Izaya did is to dodge, pull out his switchblade and slash Shizuo's shirt.

And thus… Their murderous relationship has began.

Izaya never wanted it to be that way. Not that Shizuo cares… Or anyone for that matter. I don't know if it's worth repeating but… Nobody cares about him. It was always been that way and always will be.

It was amusing at first – the fact that Shizuo cuts everything he's doing just to chase Izaya. But it later got old, and it's starting to be painful every time.

"_How many times do I have to tell you never to go to Ikebukuro again, huh?__"_

"_IZAAAYYAAA! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!__"_

"_Get out of Ikebukuro this instant!__"_

But Izaya would always face those insults with a smirk – a smirk that's powerful enough to hide the pain that he's feeling.

He would always run away, with Shizuo chasing him, and he's contented that way. He doesn't need anything else. Just the thought of having Shizuo's attention is fine. He thought that it would always be that way. He thought that they would always be together, even if it's not in a romantic way. He thought that the chains of hate would always link them together. But then… He just thought.

Because Heiwajima Shizuo took a different path – a path that's nowhere near him.

What is the proper thing to do at that time? At that time that they first met? Was it because he clapped at Shizuo's strength? Was it the way he smiled? Given those, were those enough reasons to hate him with a passion?

If Izaya didn't dodge and simply let Shizuo punch him at that time, would things not end up this way? If he dodged but didn't use his switchblade right away, what could have happened?

"_You piss me off.__"_

No, it's pointless to think these things. Because it's too late. And these sentiments would never reach Shizuo anyway. Nothing will change, nothing will happen, because he pissed Shizuo off. It will always be this way.

Would it have been better if the two of them never met? Maybe it _would_ be better, because that means they won't be wasting their time trying to kill someone. Or that's just Shizuo's side, because Izaya was never serious in trying to kill Shizuo anyway. Just the attention… it's enough.

But who's he kidding? Again, I will be repeating myself: Nobody cares about him. It has always been that way and always will be.

Izaya thanked himself for being such an excellent information broker. Because if not, he wouldn't have learned of today's event. That was always his way to learn things and always will be. He will simply watch and observe, up to the point that he will simply watch even the things that he wants to participate into.

Today is Heiwajima Shizuo's wedding day.

And that's why he was thanking himself for being such an excellent information broker. Because he knows that there's no way that he will be invited in anything.

The bride is a beautiful blonde from Russia. Her name is Vorona, if Izaya recalls correctly. She is Shizuo's _'__kouhai__'_from work, and Izaya would see them at times eating cake together in a cake shop.

Izaya never paid attention to her before, but that changed during the time that Shizuo ignored him and focused on calming that girl down. Izaya felt crushed. Shizuo's undivided attention was the only thing that he can ask for, and now it's being taken away from him.

Shizuo and Vorona left, and he's irritated. Really irritated.

It was painful. It was harsher than the feeling of their first meeting, the feeling of Shizuo's first words to him, the feeling of his insults to him… It was much more painful to be ignored.

Izaya watched from a distance as the event took place. Shizuo was smiling. He looked so happy. He has a smile so bright, and Izaya can bet that today is the happiest day in his life. Izaya knows that the smile he saw will never be directed to him, so simply seeing is fine. He's contented with just watching, because he won't be able to do anything anyway.

It's too late now. It's too late to do anything now.

Izaya won't be able to go back to those times. He won't be able to change anything. He has no choice but to accept these happenings.

He thought that they would always be together, even if it's not in a romantic way. He thought that the chains of hate would always link them together. But then… He just thought.

Now, it will never come true.

But even though Izaya needs Shizuo beside him, he cannot do anything anymore but just let it be. Shizuo would be happier this way. It was clearly better than to chase a flea.

Izaya needs to accept it because Shizuo's happy.

He can only wish for his happiness.

Even if it makes him lonely.

**THE END**


End file.
